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Year Four, Day 94: Charlie


 

I am chilled to the bone.  I dressed in layers. Wore my big, fuzzy neck scarf and gloves. But standing at the bus stop after my last student, I felt like paper in the wind.  
I was hoping my excess fat would insulate me. It did not. I have been thinking about how I've been lugging this extra weight around with me for so many years. I'd rather not think about how many.
I am ready to shed this weight. Even if I lose my protection. Protection from the cold and from whatever else I've been hiding from.
I am pleased with my discipline lately. I woke up early enough to get a short hooping session in before heading out. Saturday is my early day. I have to leave the house by 6:45 to make it to my first morning class in Portland. The 105 I-5 Express bus does not run on the weekends. So it's a longer commute.

But still. I got vertical and headed out to the living room and got my hoop on!
I am so looking forward to the warmer weather. I really enjoy hooping outside.
I am hoping to make it to the gym tomorrow. If only for a short treadmill workout and soak in the hot tub, and a session in the steam room.

My cough is back. I might as well embrace it. And perhaps give it a name. Maybe Charlie?  

Charlie has been with me off and on for going on five years now.

I have found things that help. But nothing that gets rid of him.

I think the part of the equation that I need to focus on right now is exercise. Daily. I dropped off this winter because of stress (son in jail) and illness.  

But it did me no good. I am going to keep my exercise moderate and low impact. But movement is good.  Too much bed rest, and I might as well buy myself a coffin!

Coffin. Sounds suspiciously close to "coughing".  

Now that I am exercising again, I find that attitude has improved. And my motivation.  I am practicing my piano more. And I am finally ready to conquer my memory problem! I've decided to cut back on the amount of books I haul back and forth to Portland.  Perhaps my heavy backpack is part of the reason I've been feeling so weighed down!

So I'm just carrying my Kindle for reading material, my macrame bracelet project and a light snack.  The pieces I'm working on, I am trying to memorize! I can look up the sheet music online, if I need little reminders. 

I am so excited about this! I have been playing the piano since I was 3 years old. I still have nightmares of the piano recitals I endured. The long, eerie, silent walk up to the piano, my sweaty palms and memory lapses.

I decided years ago, that if I taught piano, I would not require memorization or long, eerie, silent walks. I tell the audience to applaud as my students walk to the piano and after they perform.  Plus I sit on stage with them for moral support.Taking away the stress, in my opinion, creates relaxed performers, which in turn allows the music to flow freely. Stressed out performers, fearful of mistakes, tend to tense up and make more mistakes. 

And inhibit the flow.

Must not inhibit the flow!

Somehow there is a lesson here for me.  I think I've been hibernating, afraid of moving too much.  
When what I need to do is the opposite. Move more. Stretch, breathe!

I am in year four of this blog. My goal is to find balance in my life.  Balance physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.

Blogging about my journey helps. I'll let you know if I ever get there. 

In the meantime, have a happy Saturday!

Love,

Zita



P.S. Below is today's hooping video.






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