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Year Four, Day 11: Power Naps and a Chocolate Bar....

What do these two things have in common?

Absolutely nothing! But, the combination has lifted me out of the pit!

 Not completely out, my fingers are holding onto the edge, but I can see daylight, I can smell fresh air! Unfortunately that is all. I still have not regained my sense of smell.

I told my nurse practitioner that this morning at my appointment.  I don't know what I was thinking making an appointment for 9:00 a.m. I practically passed out on the Max train ride.

But it was good for her to witness my fatigue.

We talked about the results of my blood work. Apparently I have small veins. Her medical assistant told me that as she prodded and tried to find a vein big enough to fill several small vials. She kept make "tsk tsk" noises and telling me she didn't know if it would be enough.

Apparently it wasn't. I have to go next week to the lab after an evening of fasting and have more blood drawn.

The results that she had were negative for thyroid issues. My vitami…
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Year Four, Days 9 and 10: A Remedy for the Blues

I am combining Tuesday and Wednesday.  If you haven't noticed, I do tend to get the blues. Especially after a performance.
I suppose I suffer from Post Traumatic Performance Syndrome.
Is there such a thing?
I am too blue to Google.
I also must admit that I ate gluten recently. One lovely whole wheat roll on Friday night at dinner before the Magnificat rehearsal.  One incredible, heavenly piece of rustic bread, toasted and slathered with smashed avocado, sliced cherry tomatoes and slathered with olive oil.
OMGoodness.  It was almost worth these symptoms.
Even more fatigued then usual, upset tummy and a heavy, depressed feeling.
But I carry on!

Life is too short to waste whining. I will just trudge through to the other side.  
It helps that my daughter has asked me to come watch Baby Grace nearly every day this week. Most days for just a few hours, so she can get some computer work done.
But today, I broke my Baby Grace sitting record. Five whole hours of babysitting so my daughte…

Year Four, Day 8: Perhaps...

I got a call from my son's girlfriend after church yesterday. I was on my way to spend some much needed time with my grand daughter.

My heart started to thud as I answered. She told me her mom and her were taking him the ER. He did nut seem right. He had lost his phone and wallet yesterday. He wasn't clear on where he'd been. He went to bed super early. Was depressed.

I asked to talk to him. He sounded tired. But otherwise his normal self.

I told him it would be good for him to be seen. I was frankly shocked that they had convinced him to go in. I encouraged him to write down all his symptoms (there are many). And tell the doctor everything.

I asked him if I could come see him after I got done babysitting.

He said he'd like that. But he had to go. They were at a restaurant. Eating breakfast.

Ah! They bribed him with food! I smiled.

I was relieved. Getting my son to a doctor usually took an act of Congress. I suspected much of his symptoms had to do with his head injury…

Year Four, Day 7: Music, the Healer of My Soul

Note to self: If I ever start feeling down about myself ever again, relive the magic of last night.

My day started out quite pleasantly. I had cleared my teaching schedule for the day, so I could go to the event rested and centered.

I took my time getting ready. Then I even hooped in my performance attire. Then I stopped at Starbucks and had a lovely soy chai tea latte, lightly sweetened.

Then I hopped on a bus to the church I teach at Saturdays. I planned on practicing for an hour or so, and relaxing. Then I would hop on a bus downtown, where I would transfer to the #44 line, which would drop me off right in front of the Multnomah Art Center.

My plan was to have a nice, light supper, and then head over to the center to meet with my friend who owns the little portative organ. We were going to tune it and set it up. Then I would spend some time practicing.

It's so lovely to have a plan.

But plans don't always go as expected.

I had just reached the church, and had gotten out my…

Year Four, Day 6: Switching Brains

Here I go! On my way to the Multnomah Arts Center to play the organ in the Magnificat by J.S. Bach.

It is a sold out concert!

I am going to be a student today. A student of myself. And my teacher self is telling my student self that this performance is not a test or a competition. It has been a learning process. And I am look forward to the performance experience. Of being in the moment, surrounded by sounds of deliciousness.

It will be my supper tonight. Who needs food when you can injest music?

Sure, there are a few butterflies. There always have been. But what used to been huge Monarch butterflies are now just little Gossamer-winged butterflies. Apparently they can be quite small.

https://www.britannica.com/animal/gossamer-winged-butterfly

Besides, I like their name.

"Gossamer": "Used to refer to something very light, thin, and insubstantial or delicate"

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/gossamer

I tell my students that when we are ready to perform a pie…

Year Four, Day 5: Fabulous Friday

This will be a short post.

It is 12 a.m. I am just settling down after a magnificent dress rehearsal of "The Magnificat" by J.S. Bach.

I am speechless. The choir I accompany has been working on this incredible work of music since the beginning of the school year.

We worked hard. We sweat blood. But we are still friends. And tonight we rehearsed with an orchestra. Made up of mostly music center staff. I know several of them. I played a small organn. I was nervous. I think I was sweating blood. I am used to playing a piano, a grand piano for that matter, at rehearsal.

Even though the organ is a keyboard instrument, it is quite different than playing the piano. Plus I have very little experience playing with an orchestra. But I felt prepared. And I felt upbeat. Not quite as high and giddy as I did yesterday. But still positive. Whenever I felt my spirit start to say, I just told myself to float on the surface. I found myself  myself looking at life in a different way. Looking a…

Year Four, Day 4: Manic Thursday

Help! Something is wrong!
I feel too good!

I want to break into song and dance on this here Tri-Met bus.

I'm thinking James Brown, "Yow! I feel good, (doodle doodle doodle do), I knew that I would  (doodle doodle doodle do)..."

And you know why?

Well that's the puzzling part.

I don't know why.

James Brown knew. It was "...'coz I got you! (Doot doot doot do!)

I'm always analyzing.  Trying to find answers.  Maybe I should have been a detective. Solving the crime that is me.

I have not had coffee in two days. I did have a cup of black tea this morning.

I took my blood pressure and pulse at home.  Good stats.



I've been trying home remedies to restore my sense of smell. No luck yet.  I've been using saline nose spray, doing breathing exercises, drinking tons of water.  I even tried a teaspoon of honey sprinkled with cinnamon on my tongue.

Every chance I get, I am sniffing things. Especially things I know have strong odors. Like eucaplytus oil, Vic…