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Showing posts from April, 2017

Year Two, Day 353: ἄτακτος

Καλό απόγευμα! (Good evening) My laptop keyboard is still typing in Greek!

Luckily I am smarter than my laptop.  And in the process, hey-I am learning Greek! One word at a time!

A bit tedious, using the online keyboard.

Μuch cutting and pasting am I. 

It is ok.  It could be worse!

Plus, I am having a good day.  I am proud of myself for pulling myself up by my boot straps.  Resurrecting the self discipline, am I!

 I was hungry this morning. REALLY hungry. Which is a good thing. I am reinstalling my no food after 8 p.m. rule. It is good because, if I am hungry in the morning, that will motivate me to GET OUT OF BED!

And get out of bed I did. I left in time to stop at the little gas station and fill up my coffee mug. I made all my bus transfers with time to spare. So I sat at Safeway, and enjoyed a cup of yogurt and fruit, sipping my coffee.

Speaking of food, this is my food diary for the day. Yup. Reinstalling the food diary too!

9 a.m. Coffee, with 2 T cream and 1 T sugar.
9:40 a.m. 1 cup va…

Year Two, Day 352 Barriers

My computer is trying to kill me! Again.
 Τηε κευβοαρδ ισ ονλυ τυπινγ ιν Γρεεκ!

 (My keyboard is only typing in Greek again.)

 Arrggg!  And today of all days, I have many good things to tell you about!  Luckily, with a little clever maneuvering online, I found an online keyboard in English that I can type text in and then copy into my blog.   

Here is the link in case your computer suddenly starts types in a language other than your native tongue:

This poor laptop might finally be ready for laptop heaven. 

But on a happier note....

Baby girl clothes!  

I sooo have baby fever!

I was at the church I teach at on Saturdays today.  Knitting.  I am finally to get into the flow.  One of the ladies from the church was going down to the Children's  Closet. It was  not open to the public today. But I asked her if perchance they had newborn baby clothes. She told me they did and I was welcome to go down and take as much as I liked for my new grandbaby! 

I found s…

Year Two, Day 351: Warning: Blog About Depression - Might Be Depressing!

Back to the ol' drawing board. I feel the D word scratching at my door, howling in my ear.  I will not let him in!

I decided to be proactive. Even though I have battled depression all my life, and I have tried counseling and antidepressants, I do not consider myself healed. I have not totally conquered. If it threatens to overcome by very being, I will seek help.

Lately, I have felt weakened by it.  But the funny is, when I actually talk about it - through this blog, in prayer and with a trusted friend, it backs off.

If it is depressing for you to read about depression, you may want to skip this blog today.  Be forewarned!

Funny thing is, years ago, I thought perhaps I should go to a depression support group. I googled it. I found a "Meet-Up" group for the clinically depressed! But when I read about it, I was horrified. It sounded most depressing! And there was drama within the group. Many people had negative comments about other members, group location, etc.

Not healing…

Year Two, Day 350: Nothing Here

This is weird.  Usually I can't wait to come home and blog about my day, including some profound revelation.

Today I have nothing.

My mind is blank.

I am slightly annoyed with the whole world.  So many angry people.  So much noise, so little substance.  I crave peace and quiet. And a little more sunshine please!


Maybe I woke up on the wrong side of the bed.

Tomorrow I plan on adjusting my attitude with some serious exercise and a big salad, and a lot of water.

It is my light day tomorrow.  Just teaching piano classes at the music center.

But for now, I wish you a Happy Thursday and a restful sleep!

Talk to you tomorrow.



Year Two, Day 349: "Like Watercolor"

I started this morning on the right foot!  I actually got out of bed in time to take a brisk 3/4 mile walk up to the gas station for my $1.09 cup of coffee.  Beats Starbucks!  I bought one of their travel mugs last week, so each time I fill it - $1.09!

Alas, I missed the bus coming back I walked another 3/4 mile home! Had just enough time to inhale a bit of coffee, brush my teeth and make my bed.

Then I walked a whole 2 minutes to my church office job.

Where my computer is trying to kill me!

But today I conquered. The issue is in the margins.  When I send documents to the pastor, it messes up the margins! This week it was on the calendar that goes in the newsletter.

But I sucked down that coffee, and I think I conquered the computer.

That walk really lifted my spirits. I think and pray when I walk. And sometimes solutions to my dilemmas pop up.

One thing that occurred to me yesterday when I was talking to my friend from choir practice (the one who is usually very upbeat, but …

Year Two, Day 348: Joe Btfsplk

Today was a blue day.  I couldn't shake the feeling that a cloud was over my head. I seem to remember a cartoon character that walked around with a cloud over his.

Be right back. Going to consult Google.

I was right!  The character's name was "Joe Btfsplk" from the comic strip "Li'l Abner" by Al Capp. According to Wikipedia, Joe Btfskplk "is well-meaning, but is the world's worst jinx, bringing disastrous misfortune to everyone around him. A small, dark rain cloud perpetually hovers over his head to symbolize his bad luck."

While I don't believe I bring bad luck to everyone around me, I hope I didn't bring doom and gloom to people I made contact with.  I try really hard to keep my dark cloud to myself.

I think I blogged about the one time, there REALLY WAS a rain cloud over ONLY MY HEAD!

It was a few years back when I lived in a house off of Belmont. I rented the basement of a lovely Vict…

Year Two, Day 347: "D" Day

I was so touched by some of my lady friend's comments on Facebook after I shared my blog yesterday about my introversion and social awkwardness.  Two of them also said they were also introverted, but there was "nothing wrong with that!" My heart was really warmed.

It occurred to me, after a bit of pondering that 30+ years ago, when we all worked together, we would often hit happy hour after work. And I would inevitably consume too much alcohol in order to "loosen up".  We had some wild times. I cannot remember much of those times. But what I do recall is the hangover the next day. To our credit, I don't think we missed work. We just all crawled in and groaned and moaned and commiserated together. Someone would always go on a cheeseburger and fry run.  That seemed to be best remedy.

I no longer drink.  At least not to that extent. Maybe a glass of red wine or a beer occasionally.

But I am proud to say that I enjoy being healthy and sober.  I have come a lon…

Year Two, Day 346: Awkward Me

For an introverted, socially awkward woman, I have had quite a social weekend!

Yesterday, it was breakfast with the family and a chamber music concert I performed in.

Today, it was church followed by a women who worked at Mercedes Credit Corporation reunion luncheon.

I had not seen most of these women for over 25 years!

After church, as I started out to the restaurant we were to be meeting at, my heart started thudding.    I was more nervous about this lunch, then getting on stage and performing. But I was not going to back out. I really wanted to see my friends.  Thankfully, one of my best friends was there. I met her on the job over 30 years ago. I only worked with these ladies for 3 years or so, but have always kept in touch with my good friend. She has been the bridge to my keeping up with them. Well, her and Facebook.

I enjoyed myself, despite the thudding heart. Yes, I was a little awkward. But I always am. However, we promised to meet more regularly and include more of the gang…

Year Two, Day 345: I Am Woman, Hear Me Roar!

I am woman, hear me roar!

Most happy am I.  I figured out how to get my laptop typing in English characters again. Busted that Greek computer ghost!

I just logged out of Ubuntu and logged back in. But I was a smart cookie! First I posted on Facebook (For my eyes only) the password to my Ubuntu system via my Android phone. Just in case it asked my password and my keyboard was still typing Greek!

It worked!

Here I am. Typing merrily away in my native tongue. Aw, it is the little things in life.  Especially when there are bumps in the road that you figure out how to remove all by yourself!

Today was a good day. First I met my mom, daughter (With my grandbaby girl in her belly!) and son-in-law for breakfast. Then I taught my mom her piano lesson. She is one of my best students - practices diligently! She can also be one of my most ornery students. She HATES scales! I explained that they are the building blocks of music. That they help strengthen the hands and establish independent finger…

Year Two, Day 344: Ελληνική φάντασμα μου

I think the title of today's blog is "My Greek Ghost". If Google Translate is accurate. You'll understand shortly.

I stopped at a McDonald's after my last student tonight. Had an Egg McMuffin without the bun, sandwiched between two hash browns. And an orange juice. It is 9:00 p.m. I don't usually eat this late, but I'm actually in it for the free Wi-Fi on my Kindle.

You see, my lap top is haunted. Yup, haunted. And the ghost is Greeek.  Out of the blue this morning, as I was trying to open YouTube for my morning stretching, all the characters started coming out as Greek letters.

I tried rebooting. Still Greek. I couldn't type anything into Google for help, because, well, Greek!

Later, on the bus to the music center to teach, I searched on my Android. Problem is, my laptop is ancient. Over ten years old. About five years ago, the Windows operating system crashed. One of my brilliant students loaded UBUNTU onto it (a Linux system. Not sure I REALLY unde…

Year Two, Day 343: Gas Station Coffee and Hanging onto Jesus

I did it!

I got up in time for a brisk walk this morning.

I walked 3/4 mile to the nearest place where I could get a cup of coffee. The gas station.

It wasn't Starbucks, but it was $3.00 cheaper! And I timed it so that I could catch the bus
back home, sipping on the sweet, hot, creamy cup of goodness that gave me a boost of energy
to start my day.

I even did my morning stretches!  I am going through the "Classic FM Hall of Fame List" for 2017. Today, I stretched to Tchaikowsky's "Serenade for Strings in C Major, Opus 48". Most sublime.

I read John 20:1-18 last night in an attempt to keep Jesus by my side as I reflected on his post resurrection life on earth. I was stuck by this passage:

Jesus said, "Do not hold on to me, for I have not yet ascended to the Father. Go instead to my brothers and tell them, 'I am ascending to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God.'"
(John 20: 17 NIV)
That is what I have been trying to do! Hang on t…

Year Two, Day 342: Back to the Basics

Back in the day, when I first began this blog, I was committed to walking daily on the trail near my home. And I was regularly stretching to classical music in the morning.

Today, I took a first step in getting my groove back. No, I didn't get up and run as I had planned. But, I did get vertical early enough to get a good stretching session in. I enjoyed going through the "Classic FM Hall of Fame" list.  Classical music seems to calm my mind.  Especially instrumental music.  And listening to this playlist, which comes from a British classical station, also stretches my mind.  Stretching my body and mind. Tis a good thing!

So here is a link to the playlist.Note: This Youtube video is reversed. #1 should be "The Lark Ascending". But I decided to listen in reverse order. So I stretched to Charles Gounod's - Judex from 'Mors et Vita' this morning.  Here is the link for the "Classic FM Hall of Fame" 2017

I …

Year Two, Day 341: Faithfully

I am feeling most sluggish today.  But the blues is wearing off. I have resurrected my rosary.  It is giving me profound peace as I work through this depression.

It didn't help that I got a 2:00 a.m. call from my family member in crisis. Those of us that have dealt with family members in crisis, know that when the phone rings at 2:00, it is probably not good news.

It wasn't.

But I immediately prayed the rosary for him. When we talked an hour later, it was miraculously not as horrible as it could have been.

I was relieved. 

But I did not sleep much afterwards.

Hence, I did not get up early enough to get in my morning workout.

But I put one foot in front of the other.  Walked over to my church office job.  This has become my haven. As I learn the ropes and become more familiar with the people, I have a nice routine and I feel important.  I even learned how to use a laminater last week. I am woman, hear me roar!

I am in charge of overseeing the facility users for our building. W…

Year Two, Day 340: Blue Monday and a Special Chair

Slept like a rock last night, did I.

Slept to the last possible moment. So no early morning exercise for me.  Tomorrow then. I am determined to become a morning person. If it is the last thing I do!

I was pretty blue last night. On top of that, I took the MAX Orange Line from downtown Portland to Milwaukie after my nephew dropped me off at the transit mall in Lake Oswego.

I thought it would help my commute home.  But for once, I did not plan my trip. I just got on the #35 in Lake Oswego, headed downtown, and then jumped on the MAX.

I was in a fog.  Partly from people overload. Don't get me wrong. I love my family. But once an introvert, always an introvert. I needed time to recharge my battery.

And detox from all the rich food.  In addition to prime rib, we had ham, scalloped potatoes, mashed potatoes and gravy, and asparagus. I brought a lovely "Peruvian Hominy Salad" I picked up from Fred Meyer's deli.  It had a nice spicy bite to it. I also brought Greek olives, stuffe…

Year Two, Day 339: He Has Risen. And So Have I!

He is risen!

How I wish I could have been there.

So many emotions. So many events crammed into one day.

I went to Resurrection Day service at my little church.

My daughter and her husband attended services at their church, and then went to dinner at their friends house.

My son spent the day with his girlfriend and family.

My niece, her boy friend and my great niece spent the day with his family. 

I was invited to my brother's house. For the most incredible prime rib! My brother knows how to do a prime rib!

But I had a low grade sadness pulling at me all day. I could feel my old friend, the "D" word pulling at my sleeve. Trying to get my attention.

I felt the absence of the family members that were not there.  

But not today, I told depression.  It is Easter! I am with family!  My daughter is having a baby girl!

I forced myself to be in the moment and pay attention to those who were present. 

I wonder if others feel this way on this day.  I love the dark introspective …

Year Two, Day 338: Waiting Patiently

Today was a day full of waiting.  

Fitting, since it was Holy Saturday. In the Christian faith, this is the day the Jesus lay in the tomb. 

Some churches hold an evening "vigil" service, awaiting His resurrection on Easter Sunday.

My waiting began early this morning. Waiting for my alarm to go off.  Today was breakfast with my mom, daughter and son-in-law day.  It was also the day of my daughter's "gender reveal" party.

She had an ultrasound on Friday.  On "Good Friday", I just realized! She sent me the picture of the cutest little baby with a turned up nose. But she only had the face picture. They told the ultrasound technician to write down the gender of her baby and put it on a paper to give to her best friend.

At the party, her friend had filled a balloon with the appropriate colored powder. Then my daughter, the bow hunter woman would place her bow in the arrow, pull it back and let it fly, bursting the balloon and revealing the contents of the ballo…

Year Two, Day 337: Good Friday. Deep, Painful, Glorious Silence.

I am not going to say much tonight. I can hardly think, much less speak. 
I am wanting to honor the deep, glorious,  painful silence I experienced at the end of the "Good Friday" service at St. Ignatius.
Most of the service was conducted in the dark.  There was much prayer, scripture readings and some singing.

For the reading of the Gospel, we had an interactive reading of the "Passion of the Lord" (John 18: 1-19: 42).  We, the people in the congregation would read the words out loud in bold. Those were the words of the crowd crying to crucify Jesus.

I do not think there was a dry eye in the house. Certainly not mine.

The most powerful segment was the "Veneration of the Cross". A ("As with those who beheld Jesus on this Way of the Cross, we behold this instrument of suffering, which we also regard as the sign of our salvation" - From the "Easter Triduum 2017", St. Ignatius Church)

A group of young adults processed up the aisle with a …