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Showing posts from September, 2020

Year Four, Day 257: The Absence of Struggle

 Hello Friends: Spoiler alert: I have nothing deep or profound to say today.  It is simply a beautiful day! I had the morning off from babysitting. So I hooped, I took myself out to lunch and I walked in the park.  No struggle. Simply happy. Content even.  Well I suppose the only profound thing I can mention is the fact that because I am feeling simply happy, content and grateful today for my life  it almost caused me to NOT blog. I have always had a fear of boring and mundane. But now I see that happy is neither boring nor mundane.  And the absence of struggle is divine.  On that note, I will leave you here. I hope you are experiencing happiness today too! Love, Zita

Year Four, Day 256: Panic Attacks, Pop-Ups and My Guardian Angel Kitty

Good Morning Friends! :) I am loving these beautiful fall days!  Monday morning I woke up super early for breakfast with my mom. I walked through the park to the bus stop in pitch black. The air was fresh and clean, with a crisp, cool feeling. I wore a jacket. I carried my batlight.  Even though fall is in the air, it was. supposed to warm up to the mid-80's later.  I even got my early morning hoop session in! I apologize for the darkness, but it was 6 a.m. after all. I am just impressed that I was not only vertical, but moving! That was Monday. Here is today's hooping video: I have more energy today than I expected I would. Especially after my evening two nights ago. It started with what I like to call "pop-up" memories. I was in between students, and then boom! Out of the blue, memories assaulted me. Just popping up in my head without warning.  It was like watching a horror movie. All of my negative memories, especially of my coming of age victim moments.   Times li

Year Four, Day 255: Three Years of Hooping!

 Hello Friends: I seemed to be obsessed with my weighted hoop again.  Happily so!  I love my hoop so much, I may have to marry him! Hmmm...I never thought about the gender of my hoop.  Lol Anyway, today mark's 7 days in a row of daily hooping. This time around at least. Pun intended. About 3 years ago, when I first acquired my weighted hoop, I was hooping daily.   I just looked back through my youtube videos. My first hooping video was June 16, 2017, a little over three years ago. I think I've improved my technique a bit!   Hooping Day 1: 6/17/2017   Hooping Day 101: 09/26/2017 Hooping today, 3 years later! (Note:  Today is day 256, but I started over when there was a lapse in my hooping. Hopefully I will not have anymore lapses!) Another ritual I have added is a new morning tea: Valdam Pure Indian Teas - Himalayan Signature Green Tea. I ordered it online from Amazon.  I was really impressed with the packaging. The tea is loose leaf and came in a vacuum packed bag. They include

Year Four, Day 254: Hooping for My Sanity

Hello Friends: I'm going to sound like a broken record. I need daily exercise, not only for my physical health, but for my emotional health . And for my sanity. This week, I am proud to report, I stayed on track!  Here are my last two hooping videos: I'm starting each morning, rain or shine with Qi Gong and weighted hooping. Then later in the day I go for a walk.  I am already feeling more balanced.  Good thing, because this week was rather stressful at work. I am chuckling to myself as I type this. Because to go to work, I simply walk down the stairs to the garage/basement of the townhouse to my little cavelike room in the very back.  I sit at my piano, move the backdrop curtain of the ancient library behind my back to shield the view of my room, and then I log into Zoom.  Times have certainly changed. Merely 8 months ago, Pre-pandemic, going to work entailed walking through a park and about 1/2 mile to  "The Vine" bus stop.  Getting off down town Vancouver and board

Year Four, Day 253: "Would You, Could You -In the Rain, in the Dark...?"

 Good Morning Friends: I want to talk about overcoming obstacles today. Specifically obstacles that are nothing but excuses. Excuses that prevent me from achieving my fitness goals. Namely daily hooping. I once worked with a pastor at a Lutheran church years ago who told me, "When the going gets tough, the tough lower their expectations ". I remember how annoyed I felt by this statement . I wish I could remember the context. But I do recall his facial expression as he scanned my face for a reaction. This pastor and I had many run-ins. But I remember him fondly. He gave me much food for thought.  Yesterday I thought of him when I considered skipping my morning hooping. It was pouring down rain when I woke up. It would have been beyond lovely to dive back into bed and pull the covers over my head. But then I would have been confronted by regret and crushing guilt. So I mentally thumbed my nose at my dear pastor friend, covered my cell phone in a plastic sandwich bag. And I hoop

Year Four, Day 252: Feet Back on the Ground and a Little Spice in My Life!

Dear Friends: The smoke has cleared. And suddenly Fall! My favorite time of year.  The cooler weather, the changing colors and the hint of holidays before the weather turns.  However, here in the Pacific Northwest, one cannot predict how the weather will turn anymore. Last week seems like a nebulous dream.  I like that word. Nebulous. And now that the smoke and fog has cleared, so has my mind.   If I ever forget again, please, dear readers remind me that daily exercise is vital for my sanity! I have resumed my daily hooping, Qi Gong and walking. I plan on doing some weights at the gym 2 - 3 days a week. Without exercise, I take on a nasty, negative attitude. I do not wish to subject my friends and family to that! So exercise I must! Here are my last two hooping videos.   I am back on track with my intermittent fasting again.  I am eating within a 4 to 6 hour window and fasting between 18 and 20 hours a day. As usual, I need to tweek the quality of food I eat during my feeding time.  Mo

Year Four, Day 251: The Puddle, the Bridge and Breaking Free

Hello Friends! I can't even begin to tell you how ecstatic I was to wake up early this morning and read all my friends posts about thunderstorms, lightening and rain overnight! I slept like a log and missed it all. I have a small room in my daughter and son-in-law's garage/basement of their town house. It is like a little cave. When I am not suffering from anxiety produced insomnia, I sleep deeply. I like the dark, cave-like vibe. So when my eyes popped open about 5:30 this morning, and I saw all the posts about rain. I ran outside in my nightgown. Sure enough, the ground was wet and the divine sound of rainfall filled my ears. I can only imagine the fresh smell. I lost my sense of smell a few years ago. Supposedly related to my asthma. I know what you're thinking. Yes, it is also a symptom of Covid-19. But this was pre Covid-19. And sometimes out of the blue, I will be assailed by a scent.  Often garlic or frying onions. Sometimes smoke. And once at the mall, as I passed T

Year Four, Day 250: The Choir, BPW and Musical Withdrawal

  We didn't get rain today. I was hopeful when I saw what looked liked overcast skies this morning.  But the air quality index was still so high, and I did not see any moisture on the ground.  It looked like fog. Dense fog. It turned out to be dense smoke fog!  Who knew there was such a thing! Well, perhaps that is not a thing. What we had here in Vancouver was dense fog in addition to thick smoke.  Our air quality index is still in the hazardous range. Even higher than Portland, Oregon! So, for the third day in a row, I mostly stayed home. I did go out early for breakfast with my mom. I had cabin fever big time. When I left home a little after 6:00 a.m., I thought the air had cleared a bit. But I think I was confused by the fog and the cooler temps. By the time my mom and I finished breakfast and started back home, the smoke had settled into the fog, creating suffocating conditions. So far nearly 1 million acres have burned from wildfires in Oregon. Ten people have lost their live

Year Four, Day 249: Rain is Coming

 I filled the water resevoir in my C-pap machine last night. I haven't been using it much recently. But since my basement room smelled like a smoky bar, I thought it might help my lungs. It did. I slept like a log. But my throat and eyes burned when I woke up. I checked the air quality index.  It was in the "hazardous: zone.   My daughter-in-law suggested the app "Air Now".  It's awesome. I can check air quality anywhere in the US.  Portland is at the top of the list of poor air quality. We are being told to stay home, with the windows closed, not to barbecue, not to vacuum, avoid driving, turn on fans. We made a couple of box fan filters. And my son-in-law duct taped the front door, back door and garage door. Even with all of that, I ended up with a smoke headache.  Yes, I found out that is a thing:  https://www.oregonlive.com/health/2020/09/the-headache-isnt-all-in-your-head-oregonians-report-symptoms-from-wildfire-smoke-exposure.html Since I only had a few aft

Year Four, Day 248: Wildfires: Who Loves Zma?

Last night the sun was blood red through a smoke filled sky.   This morning, the harsh, hot winds that prevailed over the last few days had subsided.  But the skies were eerily dark - a charcoal gray.  As I opened the front door and peered out, I didn't smell any smoke. But pulled my mask up over my face, just in case.  I don't trust my nose. I have essentially been without a sense of smell for over two years now. Sometimes, scents creep through. But this morning I did not detect a thing.  I decided to walk  through the park, on my way to breakfast with my mom.  I love to walk. Especially early in the morning.   However, I felt quite ill after I got home. Thankfully my daughter was working at home, and did not need me to watch my granddaughter. My head hurt, my eyes and throat burned. And I felt dizzy. I downed a huge glass of ice water and crawled into bed.   My daughter told me to check the news. Apparently we are in for worse conditions tomorrow. A wall of smoke from the coa

Year Four, Day 247: What Happened in Vegas...

  Expectations can be brutal. Especially when reality dashes them against the rocky shores of our souls. How's that for an opening line? I was so excited about my recent trip to Las Vegas.  I haven't travelled anywhere in so long. I do believe I have been bit by the travel bug.  I want the freedom to go places I have never been, see things I have never seen and experience life as a stellar adventure! My kids are young adults with families of their own.  I have my role as Zma, as Teacher Zita. But I am on a quest to find Zita. She's hidden someone deep inside. Covered in layers. Like an onion. I like the onion analogy. Notice the outermost layer of an onion - dry  and papery. As you peel off layers, the inside is juicy and sweet. I have paid my dues of sacrifice, shame and self deprivation.  What I want now is to embrace the life I have remaining. Have you seen the life pie chart? I don't know where I read this, but it stuck with me.  Draw a circle.  And then divide it i