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Year Four, Day 71: Maya Blue

It's a gloriously beautiful day today in Portland, Oregon. The skies are clear and the most amazing shade of blue.  I looked up a color chart. It is closest to "Maya" blue. 

So I had to Google that.

Here's what I found:

"Maya blue (Spanish: azul maya) is a unique bright azure blue pigment manufactured by cultures of pre-Columbian Mesoamerica, such as the Maya and Aztec"  

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maya_blue

How totally cool is that!

It's funny that when I say "Maya Blue" it almost sounds like "Am I Blue?"  (A classic Billie Holiday song.)

I am not.

I was though. 

I am finding that I am gradually being able to find joy in life again.  My son is doing amazingly well. He has moments of frustration and depression. But he has reached a new level today. He has gotten more assertive about his life. He realizes how precious freedom is. He realizes he's made some mistakes, but he is determined to start rebuilding his life.

He even called his attorney on his own today.  One of the most frustrating parts of this process is that we cannot afford an attorney. We are at the mercy of the public defenders. 

Luckily ours is amazing. I was worried at first, I must admit.  Multnomah County public defenders are very busy people.  The first month we had little to no contact.

But we are starting to build a relationship with him. 

I feel like I can release this breath I have been holding.

But raising bail is not easy. Asking for help is painful.  But I am finding that I have people who really do care about me.

I know my son is deeply loved. But I have always been a bit of an Eeyore "Nobody cares about me" person.

I am humbled to find that is simply not true!

However, I am not sure we are going to be able to bail him out before Christmas.  We can still hope to raise bail before his trial in January though.

I am looking into doing a fundraising concert at a church or two. I have emailed some pastor friends.


It will be just me, playing classical piano, with a bit of holiday music, and perhaps a Christmas carol singalong if people are feeling merry.  If not, there will definitely be cookies and such to keep the spirits jolly and bright! 

I will keep you all posted!


But now I must run off to teach some students.

Talk to you soon!


Love,

Zita


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