Soul Runnings

Day 210.  I have been on this self-improvement journey for seven months today! And I plan on continuing.  I am quite proud of my discipline!  I have been going to the gym 5 to 6 days a week. On the days that I don't make it to the gym, I do extra walking and calisthenics. I do not eat gluten.  I usually stop eating by 7:00 p.m.  Occasionally I allow myself a small meal when I get home, which is often after 9:00 p.m.  But I eat consciously. No more mindless munching on a bowl of buttered popcorn.(How in the world did I break that habit?) Last night when I got home, I had a bowl of pinto beans, topped with beets, sauerkraut and olives.  It was surprisingly satisfying! I still have many things to work on.  One of them is worry. I tend to have a one track mind when it comes to anxiety. Yesterday, after my workout at the gym, I was getting ready to go teach piano. But I kept thinking about the most recent mass shooting in San Bernardino....

I am struggling this morning. I feel this seed of hatred wanting to bud in my heart. I am having I trouble focusing my mind on my own life. I find myself inexplicably drawn to Twitter, Facebook and the news. Trying t o make sense of the mass shootings. In particular this latest tragedy in San Bernardino. It is unique in the fact that it was a husband-wife team. It is sounding like he was radicalized online or perhaps through his wife, or with her. I am sickened, yet fascinated. I do not want to think about these things. But my faith teacher's not to judge, but to love. And there is a tiny grain of compassion for the people who are vulnerable to indoctinization. A very small grain. But it is there. I do want to be aware. I want to understand their motivation. Why? Perhaps I am thinking the answer to preventing more attacks is in understanding their ideology and motivation. It makes my heart beat way too fast, however. So what will calm and center me?After 9-11, like many, ...

My inner peace was shattered yesterday over a plate of butter chicken and dal at the Taj Mahal Indian Restaurant in Salem. Add http://www.tajmahalsalem.com/ My mother called, sounding distressed. I think she was crying. She told me to turn on the news, there had been another shooting. I told her I was at a restaurant. They only played the "Punjabi" Indian music channel. So she filled me in.  It was still an active shooter situation in San Bernardino, California.  I told her to take a deep breath. I would call her back after I got to the bus station. They had wi-fi, I could get breaking news on my Kindle. I finished my lunch.  I did not mourn the loss of my inner peace.  I believe it is important to stay alert and informed in this world.  Noone can help or make changes if they turn their back on suffering and injustice. I walked downtown Salem, through the capital mall, past the"Walk of Flags". It occurred to me that life goes on. ...

I'm on the Amtrak bus to Salem. Why a difference a few weeks makes.I am not sure I am ready to talk about this, but this morning during Mass, I had a profound shifting of consciousness. I am now enjoying being almost completely anxiety free, and immersed in the present moment. Oh yes, and there is this feeling of inner peace. I have been reaching for this my whole life. Wondering what is wrong with me. Trying to figure out what I am missing. I don't yet have the answer. But I know God is part of the equation. On that note, I am going to pause and look out the window.And enjoy this feeling. Of simply being. Happy Wednesday!

I've been distracted lately! Here are this week's stats compared to last week: December 1, 2015 BP: 110/78 Pulse: 77 Weight: 188 lbs. Neck: 14" Chest: 43" Waist: 38" Hips: 43" Thighs: 21" Biceps: 13" Calves: 15" Ankles: 9 November 25, 2015 BP: 118/91 Pulse: 89 Weight: 187 lbs. Neck: 14" Chest: 42"  Waist: 37" Hips: 44" Thighs: 21.5" Biceps: 13" Calves: 15" Ankles: 9 Not bad, considering I had TWO Thanksgiving meals!  Daily exercise, you are my best friend for life!  Also very nice to see my BPand pulse down to a normal healthy reading again. .Yay! :)

Matthew 25:40 "The King will reply, 'Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.' A 6:45 a.m. workout, free coffee from Taco Bell and Mass- and my day has just begun! Last night I was waiting for the bus to connect me to the bus that would take me to my final family of piano students. Two brothers, 8 and 10 years old. Very musical and fun to teach. However, I was getting grumpy, cold and wet. I hadn't packed an umbrella and it had begun to rain. Plus one of my boots sprung a leak. Even with my thick, wool socks, my left foot was soaked. I had visions of hypothermia. Thankfully I only had a 6 minute wait. Plus, there was a convenience store a few feet away. So I sloshed on over and bought myself a small bag of comfort. Mixed nuts never tasted so good! I poured a cup of chai tea from my thermos and enjoyed my snack.  The bus seemed to magically appear as I finished the last nut. I had...

So, I was really tired last night. I made a nice meal of beef short ribs marinated in maple syrup, cider vinegar and olive oil. Baked on low for two hours. Served it with coleslaw and beets. I was planning on laying down in bed and reading at 8:00, but ended up falling asleep. I was really excited about getting up early and hitting the gym before Mass. But, alas, my sleep disorder kicked in. I woke up with a start at 11:30 p.m., thinking it was already morning. Wide awake! Brain racing. So I read and did some web surfing.  Tried everything. Prayed, counted sheep, tried different sleeping positions. Got up and had a glass of water. Wide. Awake. Staring at ceiling. I think I finally nodded off around 3:00 a.m.! One really good thing about my insomniac night is that I found a run I'd like to aim for! I remember back in the day, when I first starting writing this blog, I had set a goal for a 5K. But I didn't follow through. I ended up switching from jogging on the trail t...