Skip to main content

Year Four, Day 245: A Lesson in the Blues

 Hello Friends:

I have much good news!  First of all, the music center where I have been teaching for many, many years is rehiring!  

My life will soon be back on track!  Well, soon is relative. It will be a process. I will still be teaching online at home, until the City of Portland allows us to return to our building. At that point, we may still be teaching online, but I will have the option of teaching with better quality equipment, on better quality instruments, in a better lit space.  

Plus, I will be able to walk and commute and emerge from my cave on occasion!

To celebrate, I grabbed my weighted hoop and walked across the street to the park for a hoop workout.  I have not been hooping much. I still walk daily, and have been trying to make it into the gym but I have had extra Zma duties since my daughter and her husband's photography business has been super busy.

I am always a bit nervous to hoop in the park in the afternoon lest I run into oodles of people. Rather self conscious am I. But for some reason, putting my 58 year-old self out on Youtube for the whole world to see doesn't bother me. 

I really need to get back to daily hooping. I need to get back to daily lots of things. 

I feel like I am coming out of a depression.  Of the pandemic sort. It does help that I have an awesome man that I am dating. It doesn't help that it is a long distance relationship...

Which brings me to my other good news: I am actually taking a real live vacation at the beginning of September. 

To Vegas!

To visit my boyfriend!

Most excited am I! I have never been to Vegas. And more importantly, it has been many moons since I have had a boyfriend. :)

Life is definitely looking up.

It has been challenging working from home. At first, I was quite thrilled to have the excuse not to go anywhere. It was like a gift of extra time.  I spent a lot of time, reading, watching television shows, walking in the park, and watching the news of the pandemic unfold.

As time dragged on however, I stopped watching the news. I merely check in with a few news sites daily for anything earth shaking. 

And I stopped watching tv.  

And all those projects I had in mind when we were first quarantined?  Like learning ukelele, learning to play in a different style on the piano (most notably blues and worship music), well that kind of fell by the wayside too.

And I thought it would be fun teaching online. It is not horrible. But the internet signal is not so strong in my basement room.  The audio is often distorted. I have been able to teach, and many of my students are actually thriving, especially my intermediate and more advanced students.  It is really challenging to teach the beginners. They need me there.  And to be honest, this introvert is really missing people contact.  

Maybe I am not such a hermit after all!  

This week I had a revelation from one of my older students. I'll call her "B". She just graduated from high school in June.  Of course, she wasn't able to attend the ceremony with the pandemic in full swing. She had been sharing her college plans with me all year. She was accepted to several universities all over the country. 

But with the current climate of Covid-19, she and her parents have decided to delay college for a year. She will take some classes online from PCC and prepare for next year.

When we signed onto Skype this week, her hair was wild, and her eyes heavy.  Immediately, I was concerned.  Long ago, I told myself that my relationship with my students was to always be more important than the subject matter.  I have had lessons over the years where students and I just talked about whatever was going on in their lives. Sometimes for the whole lesson!

And that is what I did with B this week. We talked the whole lesson. She told me straight up she had not practiced at all. She sighed heavily.

I asked her what was going on.

"I'm depressed", she said bluntly.  She and I had talked about depression before. I shared with her some of my struggles with the blues.

"I'm also just very lonely", she said.  She sounded like she was choking back tears. She told me how she missed her friends and all her former activities.

"Also, Portland is getting so scary", she said. "Every night we hear noises like loud firecrackes, guns and bombs. It sounds like a war".

My heart went out to this very perceptive young lady. I have known her and her family since she was a toddler. She started taking lessons about 5 years ago. Piano has always been a side interest of hers. But we have a nice teacher-student friendship.

We commiserated for a bit. It felt good to talk to her.  Near the end of the lesson, I told her if she was burned out on traditional piano lessons, we could try something new.  I pointed to my ukelele hanging on the wall behind my piano.  I asked her if she was interested in ukelele. She said she was. I told her if her parents would buy her one, I could teach her. I have enough basic knowledge of the instrument as well as over 50 years of music reading experience. Plus, it would give me incentive to practice too!

She also admitted she didn't like practicing the piano in front of her parents, who stayed up quite late.  The piano was in the living room. She would put on headphones when they were there watching television, but she could feel their presence.

This made me laugh. I told her I didn't like to practice when there were people around either! I suggested they pick up a keyboard for her room. She likes to play late at night, and sometimes learn tunes by ear, improvise and compose.  She was excited by that.

Since our time was over, I suggested she get out a piece of paper and a pen. I told her to make a list of all the positive things she could do to lift her up.  She had quite a list! I told her also, that when I have the blues, I like to just immerse myself in it!  Listen to the blues, play the blues, read a dark novel. 

I had taught "B" the blues scale years ago.  She liked the idea of playing the blues when she had the blues!

I told her that I didn't like watching tv much lately, because I wasn't interested in anything.  That's when she asked me if I liked Korean drama! I had never watched Korean drama, I admitted. She asked if I like romance. 

At this point in my life, I thought to myself, yes I do!  So she is making me a list of Korean Romantic shows to watch. She's including Japanese and Chinese, but she said that she likes Korean best.

She also to me she likes to listen to "Low-Fi" when she reads.  

I asked her if that was a station.

"It's a genre of music", she replied.

I had not idea "B" even knew the word genre. She must have  a very good teacher.

I felt like a good teacher after our "lesson". No, we didn't learn a lick of piano. But we contributed to each other's well being.  And I think that is much more important.

There will always be another music lesson. But to help pull someone out of the abyss? That is priceless!

Happy Saturday Friends!

Talk soon.

Love,


Zita


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Year Four, Day 328: Success at Last!! This is What I Do

Hello My Long Lost Friends! Or, perhaps it was I who was lost? And now I think I am beginning to find myself!  Under layers of fat, and self loathing!  How's that for an opening line!  Or perhaps the title of a novel:  Layers of Fat and Self-Loathing! Today I stepped on the scale.  I am weighing myself every morning these days. I was shocked! I told my partner the scale must be broken!  Yesterday I weight 186. Today 185! I have been on a strict intermittent fast for the past 10 weeks. I have officially lost 12 pounds!  And the best news is I think I not only can stick to this way of eating, I am actually beginning to really enjoy it!  And look how far I've come! I've been writing since May 12, 2015.  Over 8 years now!  I know this blog post says Year Four, Day 328, but there have been many pauses in blogging. For instance, when I am not pleased with progress or simply have no words! I was 53 when I first began blogging. I am now 61. I honestly feel better than I did 8 years

Year Four, Day 335: "Crisis Fatigue"

Hello Friends! I have missed you! I have been so utterly exhausted and downright depressed, that I couldn't summon enough energy to even lift my fingers to this computer keyboard to write.  Apparently there is a mental disorder for people going through crises.  Crises such as pandemics, systemic racism, political division, unemployment, police brutality, civil unrest.... It's called "crisis fatigue". When humans are presented with a threat, adrenaline is released to give us quick energy. This is called the "fight or flight syndrome". But when threats are overwhelming, and perceivably continuous, like this year, it overwhelms the system. People can feel numb, depressed, anxious and irritable. Yup. That's me.  I guess I'm quite normal after all! I found an interesting article that describes crisis fatigue, especially in relation to current events.  But it doesn't really address how to take care of ourselves during these unsettling times!

Year Two, Day 248: I G T J!

I got the job! I had such a good feeling when I went into the interview. Lovely little church, really cool pastor (She preaches without her shoes! My type of woman!) I'll be the church secretary. It is very part time. But it will give me a little financial stability so I can breathe a bit! I will have to alter my morning routine. Eh hem, read that as WAKE UP EARLIER! Which I have been attempting to do since I have been writing this blog. Ok. Since I have been alive! Not a morning person, am I!  :) I am so happy. Because yesterday morning, there were so many hurdles getting to the interview, that I said, "God, I'd better get this job after all I am going through!" And He answered my prayer. Thank You, God. You are so good! But about those hurdles... First, I found out a MAX train had derailed early in the morning, which caused delays system wide.  That put a cramp in my commute, since the shortest trip to the church was to hop on Max to the mall and