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Year Two, Day 230: Soul Tending

At 3:30 a.m. I woke with a start. Heart pounding. Mouth dry.

I had the most vivid disturbing nightmare. I dreamt I was playing in a concert. Accompanying various singers. But I couldn't find the right shoes backstage. Sp I put on six inch stilettos. Came tottering out on stage, and discovered I had the wrong music folder. Tottered backstage and got the right one.

There was dead silence in the audience. I was trying to act cool, lole I had it all under control

I was to play a solo first. But when I opened my folder, nothing looked familiar. Just black, blurry dots on a white page.

I decided to fake it. I just started playing, improvising a bit, and I started veing able to make out some of the chords, but then a breeze came up and kept turning my page. I heard snickering in the background. My heart sank

My hands started to shake.

Just then I realized I had forgotten to practice!

That's when I woke up.

My pulse has slowed down to almost normal. I took a big gulp of water. I assured myself I did not have any upcoming concerts I had to practice for.

I think I'll sleep now for a few hours. Hopefully with dreams of puppies and butterflies!

Talk to you later...

It is now later.

I spent most of the day with my daughter. My sick daughter.  We started with our traditional pho.  She has the flu. But a different strain than mine was. She mostly has fatigue and body aches.  The pho seemed to revive her a bit.

We did some shopping afterwards. We decided that orange chicken, rice and vegatables were in order for dinner.

So after pho and shopping, she came home and did laundry and settled down for a nap. I made dinner and cleaned.

The orange chicken was da bomb!

I really do not know where the day went. Or how I am ever going to be able to go back to a regular working schedule next week when winter term begins!

After the dishes were done, I settle down with my prayer journal and my bible.  Then I realized why I had been a bit out of sorts all day. I had forgotten to pray!

I am on week two, day two of Challenge: Daily Meditations on "The Spiritual Exercises of Saint Ignatius"

Today the focus was on how we see ourselves, how others see us and how God sees us.  The exercise was to pick two words that I would use to describe myself. Two words my friends would use. Two words my family would use. And two words I think God would use.

My Words;
1. Compassionate
2. Fearful

My Family`s Words:
1. Sensitive
2. Optimistic

My Friend`s Words:
1. Funny
2. Interesting

God`s Words:
1. Loving
2. Insecure

I am so glad I am doing this study. The timing is perfect. I have down time between teaching. I have been ill and home bound. I have taken a break from dating.  A good time to work on myself.  When I feel better physically, I will spend more time on my physical self with longer workouts at the gym. But now, I feel my soul needs tending.

I want to share with you the introduction to week two in the book:

"Someone said, "I am three persons; the person I think I am,
the person you think I am, and the person I really am".

The daily meditations of this week are designed to help you get a clearer picture of the real you---not the "you" you think you are, not the "you2 other people think you are, but the "you" you really are.

The grace you ask of God before each meditation is this;

"Lord, give me eyes to see myself as I really am".

Perhaps this has been the destination of my journey after all. To discover my true self!
Happy Tuesday!


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