Skip to main content

Year Two, Day 88: Choosing Freedom!

Today is day 7 of my "happiness way":



"The way to happiness:
Keep your heart free from hate, your mind from worry.
Live simply, expect little, give much.
Fill your life with love.
Scatter sunshine.
Forget self, think of others.
Do as you would be done by.
Try this for a week and you will be surprised".
~The Power of Positive Thinking, Norman Vincent Peale, 1952
 
I have done this to the best of my ability for a week.  And I am surprised. 
 
First of all,that I spent so much time thinking negatively.  I knew I was a worrier, but I would have hateful thoughts just "pop up", kind of like those annoying pop up ads on your computer!

Secondly, that I thought of myself almost constantly! My aches and pains, my level of sleepiness, my level of hunger, my anxieties...Oy!  Way too self involved am I!

Third, once I started noticing these patterns, and replacing them with positive thoughts, smiles, deep breathing, and passages from scripture, I felt lighter and had more time! 

More time for others. I have had wonderful interactions with people this week. Surprising for an introvert!  Maybe I am no quite so introverted as I thought?  Perhaps just buried in negativity?

One big step I made has really helped my frame of mind.  I decided to not post political opinions on Facebook anymore.  I am still staying aware of the world. I check breaking news every morning. I listen to a bit of NPR and talk radio during the day.  But I am focusing more on my little microcosm.  
 
I am feeling such freedom in this decision! I am interested in the world, but not taking politics and the media quite so personally.  
 
It's the same feeling I have gotten when I finish binge watching a tv show.  Even better, when I CHOOSE to discontinue binge watching. I feel like I am coming out of a dream.  
 
This political race has become like a reality show. 

I am still considering a part time morning job. But as I look into the job market, I am being discerning.  Because this week I had so many moments with piano students that filled my heart with joy. Especially since I have removed so much negativity from my heart - I have more room for joy!

I have students that really love to learn. That listen to my instruction and take pride in their efforts.  

I may have mentioned before that I consider the teacher-student relationship to be even more important than the subject I teach.  Once we have trust and  mutual respect, the teaching and learning comes naturally!

And I have that. With students that have been with me for many years.  Sometimes I get distracted by my own worries and fail to appreciate this.

So, the part time job I take will need to give me ample time to continue with my core stellar students.  I feel it is best that I do not spread my teaching energy out too thin. I do not anticipate taking on new students.

I did find a clinical research opportunity that might fit nicely in my life.  It is a fibromyalgia study. I have long suspected that I might have fibromyalgia.  I spoke to a wonderful young woman this afternoon. She is the research coordinator. She did a brief phone screening and believes I qualify for the study. It is a paid study. And I benefit from medical tests and consultations with a physician.

And perhaps I will finally be pain free!
 
I am looking forward to learning more. I have an appointment next week.
 
I also have a blues piano camp I am teaching the last week of August.
 
Then fall term will start and I can breathe easier financially.
 
I actually have a very good life, I realized after my 7 day happiness journey.  I think I shall continue monitoring my thoughts and choosing positivity.
 
I checked out another book by Norman Vincent Peale at the library:
 
It's funny, I used to turn my nose up at positive thinking books and overly optimistic people. I would think they were phony or out of touch with reality.

But I have had enough reality. Enough virtual reality.  I am ready for more sunshine in my life.  

On to week two of the happiness way!

Happy Friday!
 
 

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Year Four, Day 328: Success at Last!! This is What I Do

Hello My Long Lost Friends! Or, perhaps it was I who was lost? And now I think I am beginning to find myself!  Under layers of fat, and self loathing!  How's that for an opening line!  Or perhaps the title of a novel:  Layers of Fat and Self-Loathing! Today I stepped on the scale.  I am weighing myself every morning these days. I was shocked! I told my partner the scale must be broken!  Yesterday I weight 186. Today 185! I have been on a strict intermittent fast for the past 10 weeks. I have officially lost 12 pounds!  And the best news is I think I not only can stick to this way of eating, I am actually beginning to really enjoy it!  And look how far I've come! I've been writing since May 12, 2015.  Over 8 years now!  I know this blog post says Year Four, Day 328, but there have been many pauses in blogging. For instance, when I am not pleased with progress or simply have no words! I was 53 when I first began blogging. I am now 61. I honestly feel better than I did 8 years

Year Four, Day 335: "Crisis Fatigue"

Hello Friends! I have missed you! I have been so utterly exhausted and downright depressed, that I couldn't summon enough energy to even lift my fingers to this computer keyboard to write.  Apparently there is a mental disorder for people going through crises.  Crises such as pandemics, systemic racism, political division, unemployment, police brutality, civil unrest.... It's called "crisis fatigue". When humans are presented with a threat, adrenaline is released to give us quick energy. This is called the "fight or flight syndrome". But when threats are overwhelming, and perceivably continuous, like this year, it overwhelms the system. People can feel numb, depressed, anxious and irritable. Yup. That's me.  I guess I'm quite normal after all! I found an interesting article that describes crisis fatigue, especially in relation to current events.  But it doesn't really address how to take care of ourselves during these unsettling times!

Year Four, Day 247: What Happened in Vegas...

  Expectations can be brutal. Especially when reality dashes them against the rocky shores of our souls. How's that for an opening line? I was so excited about my recent trip to Las Vegas.  I haven't travelled anywhere in so long. I do believe I have been bit by the travel bug.  I want the freedom to go places I have never been, see things I have never seen and experience life as a stellar adventure! My kids are young adults with families of their own.  I have my role as Zma, as Teacher Zita. But I am on a quest to find Zita. She's hidden someone deep inside. Covered in layers. Like an onion. I like the onion analogy. Notice the outermost layer of an onion - dry  and papery. As you peel off layers, the inside is juicy and sweet. I have paid my dues of sacrifice, shame and self deprivation.  What I want now is to embrace the life I have remaining. Have you seen the life pie chart? I don't know where I read this, but it stuck with me.  Draw a circle.  And then divide it i