Skip to main content

Year Two, Day 267: Crazy Hair Day and Keeping the "D" word at Bay



I am having one of my extremely low energy days. My heart feels heavy. There is a tired, sad feeling right behind my eyes if that makes sense.  I can see it in the selfie I took.  My hair reflects the chaos in my soul (and the bitter wind that has been whipping me about from bus stop to bus stop today!)

I can feel the "D" word lurking around the corner.  I wished I could have just pulled the blankets over my head this morning and stayed in bed.

But I have a strong work ethic. And I've discovered one way to keep the "D" word at bay, is to just keep putting one foot in front of the other.

So I did.  I got out of bed. I made my morning tea. I had a bowl of instant grits for breakfast.( (Grits has always been one of my comfort foods. Must be my Texan background!)

 I did a shortened version of my prayer, journaling and bible study since I was moving so slowly.

Today I had a rehearsal for the "Penguin Musical" at a school.  All first graders. Most adorable. I love the woman who writes these. She absolutely loves what she does and it shows. And it did lift my spirits.  A bit.

I decided to take myself out for lunch in the hopes of lifting myself further out of the pit. I went to "Hoho". An old family favorite. I ordered cashew shrimp and hot and sour soup. Delicious as usual.  I read a bit from Uninvited: Living Loved When You Feel Less Than, Left Out, and Lonely by Lysa TerKeurst.  I feel like she is my soul sister. Even though we have never met and probably never will.

I almost dropped my chopsticks when I read,

 "It's painful to be in a crowded room and fell all alone...We must respect ourselves enough to break the pattern of placing unrealistic expectations on others. After all, people will not respect us more than we respect ourselves...some of our biggest disappointments in life are the result of expectations we have of others that they can't ever possibly meet...Unrealistic neediness is actually greediness in disguise. It's saying, 'My needs and desires deserve to tap into or possibly even deplete yours.' This will never set a relationship up for success."

Oy. The truth hurts. But then the truth sets us free. As much work as I have done on myself, it is just the tip of the iceberg. And suddenly it dawned on me. I mean, suddenly, as in RIGHT THIS MOMENT as I am typing this. The gloom has lifted a bit.  Perhaps God gives me these under the weather, fighting with the "D" word days to give me a chance to hit the pause button. To be still and reflect. To look deep inside myself. To face my truth and let Him mold me.
I just took a deep breath. And I just smiled a bit.  I think I am going to just let my thoughts end here.  
Pause, breathe, smile. Go teach some piano students.  

And keep the "D" word in the dungeon where he belongs!

Happy Thursday!

Love, Joy and Peace to you all,

Zita

 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Day 338: Unicorns in the Bible!

I am still working out the kinks in my daily routine. I am going to try practicing piano first today. I find I get so sidetracked that I don't get enough time in, and then I feel stress. I have quite a few performances coming up. Do not need stress!  So, my new daily plan will look something like this:  Wake up Pray Drink water and smoothie Piano practice Exercise Lunch Teach Read Bible and blog in between students Dinner Stretch Pray Bed My daughter and I food prepped last night. We made enough crockpot meals for our family of four for the next 2 to 3 weeks.  We put them in bags and tossed them in the freezer. We have turkey, veggie chili going on right now. Man, does the house smell good! My psalm of the day made me chuckle today. And got me curious about translations.  I read Psalm 29 in my King James Bible. Notice the appearance of the mythical unicorn in verse 6!   Psalm 29 1   Give unto the LORD, O ye mighty,  ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Year Two, Day 201: "I"

Before my first meeting with "I" I had a wonderful first date last night! We had a lot on common. The conversation flowed easily. We laughed. It was so lovely, that I think I shall not blog about him. Not yet anyway. I am just going to call him "I". I like I. 😉 Today was a long, wonderful family day. Went to church with my daughter and son-in-law. Very powerful, uplifting service. After that we went to the horse races. Had a blast. Broke even. Essentially had a free lunch and four hours of entertainment. After the horses, we had yet another Thanksgiving dinner at my niece's place. It was her first turkey. It was amazing! But thank God I had enough willpower to resist the pie! Tomorrow I go for my first physical therapy appointment. Tuesday it is back to the gym!! Happy Sunday!
Post a Comment
Read more

Year Three, Day 110: I Like Change, But How Do I Help the Suffering?

I woke up in a bit of a panic this morning. I had planned on getting to the track by 6:30 a.m., because I thought today was the first day of school. You see, the public is not allowed to use the track when school is in session. Understandably so. But alas, I overslept! I still headed out with my hoop, hoping it was before school hours at 7:30 a.m. And I breathed a sigh of relief. The school looked vacant. And only one solitary jogger with her solitary dog was present. I got busy in case the kids were due to arrive. Got a nice hoop workout in. No sign of children as I walked back to the house. So I did what I should have done in advance. I consulted Google. And most happy am I - North Clackamas School District does not start back to school until September 6th! Portland Public Schools start today. But the elementary school next door to the track lists "student hours" as 7:45 - 2:00 p.m. So I really am going to have to get an earlier start next week. I am aiming...
Post a Comment
Read more