Year Four, Day 189: Ah, Balance!

Ah, Balance! It is like surfing the wave of the present moment.

I know when I am balanced.  I am present in the moment.  Not worried about the future. Not regretting the past. I smile easily.  My pulse is slow and even. The breath is easy and natural. And I check out many books and DVD's from the library!

Decreased stress is a great mood balancer!

I am greatly relieved after today's day at the courthouse with my son.  They have set his sentencing date.  It is roughly two weeks after the due date of his baby boy.  This should be enough time for him to be present at the birth and spend time with him before he goes off to "further his education" as his mother-in-law puts it.

We met with his DISP program administrator today.  Everyone we have been working with so far has been wonderful.  She is especially positive.

If you are not familiar with DISP, here you go:

"DISP is a post conviction, voluntary treatment court for repeat DUII offenders.  We take a collaborative and holistic approach to solving the problems that contribute to creating and perpetuating the repeat DUII offender.

DISP combines the treatment court model and intensive supervision.  DUII offenders are required to have frequent meetings with court based case managers, electronic alcohol monitoring, frequent and random alcohol and drug testing, long term treatment with mental health components, and 12 step meeting attendance. Additional conditions of probation include payment of fees, fines and restitution, full time work, GED, ESL, social activity, honesty and driving only with the court’s permission. These conditions, more often than not, lead to permanent changes in behavior.

GOALS OF DISP:

• Protect the community
• Reduce DUII recidivism and related criminal activity
• Provide access to treatment, and to self help groups to enhance long term sobriety
• Enhance quality of life for all Oregon citizens"  
• https://www.mcda.us/index.php/community-initiatives-special-programs/duii-diversion-and-disp/

Everyone has warned us that this is an intense program, not for the meek and mild.  I am so proud of my son for embracing this program. Not just for a reduced jail sentence, but because he told his attorney, the judge, the D.A., and everyone in the courtroom that he needs help and is committed to change. Not just for him, but for his girlfriend and baby on the way.

After hearing about the program more in detail today, it is clear that the people in charge have an abundance of compassion and are there to help, not punish their clients.  They are big on education and communication.

I have a good feeling about this.  But he will have to make a lot of meetings, classes and appointments.  I told him he should buy an old school notebook and write everything down. He had a traumatic brain injury a few years ago. He forgets things.  Heck, I forget things!  But his girlfriend and I also are keeping track of his appointments as back up.

This has been a long, painful journey. Almost a year of jail, bail, attorneys, judges, hearings, tears and fears.

It is not over. It is never over. Not in this mortal life. Always something to worry about. But I feel like we have reached a new level here.

Now I can actually enjoy watching a movie and reading more than just intense suspense thrillers to escape my life.  And maybe I can be just a little bit more present for the other people in this world who might need me. Including myself!

Note:  ***Warning: Rant ahead!***

 I am finally giving in and giving Doctor Who another chance! I also found a BBC series at the library called "Detectorists". It looks amusing.  I am almost finished with The Night Window, the last of the Jane Hawk series by Dean Koontz.  I loved it. But it was a bit of a roller coaster ride. It served it's purpose in numbing me from my reality. But, dang that sh*t was scary! No more Dean Koontz for awhile. Sorry, my man. I love your writing, but sometimes the darkness you describe is a little too real.  I checked out Driving Hungry, A Memoir by Layne Mosler for my next read.  It sounds lovely. About a woman who dines in restaurants suggested by taxi drivers all over the world.  Much easier on my nerves than evil, rich people injecting mass amounts of people with nanotechnology in order to enslave them and create a world in which they have absolute control.  Sounds too feasible. And I am getting tired about reading about power hungry, evil rich people.  I know they exist. But I don't really want to think about them! 

***End of rant.***

And end of today's post.

Happy Tuesday!

Love,

Zita

P.S. Here are my most recent hooping videos: Days 137 and 138. Still going strong!