Yesterday morning in church, I had a bit of an issue. I almost felt like I was having a heart attack. My whole head tightened up, my jaw ached, my vision went blurry and my heart started racing.
Luckily I recognized the signs of a panic attack.
I was able to breathe through it. At the break, I had some water and some fruit.
But then I proceeded to feel odd most of the afternoon.
I made it to the other side though. But it did alarm me. It came upon me so suddenly.
The rest of the day, I had to be careful how I spoke and looked at people. I tried to be invisible. Because I feared they would see the crazed look in my eye and that might be alarming. The crazed look was just the feeling of blood pulsating at my temples.
That sounds crazy indeed!
But the funny thing is, what really helped me break out was Words with Friends.
Yup. That silly internet game.
That I have a mild obsession with.
That I am actually quite good at!
It calms me and gives me something to look forward to.
Except for the creepy guys. (Henceforth known as "CG")
Did you know about the creepy guys on Words with Friends? I have been tormented by them for years now. More lately even.
Perhaps I should not play games with strangers, you must be thinking at this moment. I agree. But I am determined to be #1 on Words with Friends, so I accept game requests from anyone who challenges me. And I am friendly. I seriously develop feelings of crushing guilt if I do not respond to an innocent "Hi" Although in most CG situations, I am convinced they are not innocent - they have an agenda! And I am particularly annoyed by people with agendas. Especially CG agendas.
I have devloped a radar for CG's. After all CG have been stalking me since my early teens. But that is another story. But knowing that background, may explain why it was important for me to make a stand!
The CG's on Words with Friends have a common modus operandi. Their pictures show rather attractive, wealthy appearing men. First they challenge me to a game. When I accept, hey usually start chatting right away.
i.e. "Hi"
At which point, I feel my left eye twitching. I can almost predict what comes next.
Because of my overdeveloped conscience, and the pressing guilt for not acknowledging a friendly greeting, I usually give a noncommittal "Hello" right back.
I can predict the next questions: "Are you married with children? Where are you from? Where did you grow up? How do you feel about long distance relationships?" Sigh.
Usually I just tell them I am online to play WWF's. Not interested in chatting, sorry.
But today, I felt a bit of mischief bubbling inside. It could have been left over from the panic attack yesterday.
On a side note, I am curious about my reactions. Why did I always get offended? Why did I supply curt replies? And when they started hitting on me, get angry?
Something snapped inside. I am tired of the game! I know what they are up to! (Although not always sure the motive. Con artist? Terrorist? Pervert? 14 year-old on Mommy's computer?)
I hope you don't think I am evil. My guess is most of these men are not who they say they are. I really don't know what their agenda is. Probably playful flirting. They never ask me for my bank account or address. But why Words with Friends? Are there not other platforms for flirtation online?
I kid you not, I have had dozens of encounters in the last several months. The first few I naively chatted with a bit until I realized where they were heading. Then I informed them I'm not into that kind of talk.
But curiously, the language is similar with each encounter.
Yesterday, I rose up and confronted all the CG's on Words with Friends - AND I beat them all in our word matches!
I even asked one if there was a how-to video on YouTube describing how to pick up women on WWF!
That guy took it well. He actually apologized for offending me. I am still beating him.
One guy took it quite badly. Kept "yelling" at me saying he was not "one of those fake guys". Then he resigned the game. Good thing too. I was leading by over 150 points - Woot Woot!
Good thing I had the forethought to change my user name.
I am now "Serafina". From Italy.
I like that. I had fun playing the role. But I'm done now. Back to "I'm just here to play WWF. Not into chatting. Have a nice day".
It was fun while it lasted!
And my headache is gone!
And I am smiling!
Now to walk like a ballerina to piano class.
Talk soon!
Happy Monday!
Love,
Zita
aka Serafina
ps Here is a short video of my Qi Gong/Hooping workout this morning. Maybe if CG's saw this, they'd leave me alone! LOL
Luckily I recognized the signs of a panic attack.
I was able to breathe through it. At the break, I had some water and some fruit.
But then I proceeded to feel odd most of the afternoon.
I made it to the other side though. But it did alarm me. It came upon me so suddenly.
The rest of the day, I had to be careful how I spoke and looked at people. I tried to be invisible. Because I feared they would see the crazed look in my eye and that might be alarming. The crazed look was just the feeling of blood pulsating at my temples.
That sounds crazy indeed!
But the funny thing is, what really helped me break out was Words with Friends.
Yup. That silly internet game.
That I have a mild obsession with.
That I am actually quite good at!
It calms me and gives me something to look forward to.
Except for the creepy guys. (Henceforth known as "CG")
Did you know about the creepy guys on Words with Friends? I have been tormented by them for years now. More lately even.
Perhaps I should not play games with strangers, you must be thinking at this moment. I agree. But I am determined to be #1 on Words with Friends, so I accept game requests from anyone who challenges me. And I am friendly. I seriously develop feelings of crushing guilt if I do not respond to an innocent "Hi" Although in most CG situations, I am convinced they are not innocent - they have an agenda! And I am particularly annoyed by people with agendas. Especially CG agendas.
I have devloped a radar for CG's. After all CG have been stalking me since my early teens. But that is another story. But knowing that background, may explain why it was important for me to make a stand!
The CG's on Words with Friends have a common modus operandi. Their pictures show rather attractive, wealthy appearing men. First they challenge me to a game. When I accept, hey usually start chatting right away.
i.e. "Hi"
At which point, I feel my left eye twitching. I can almost predict what comes next.
Because of my overdeveloped conscience, and the pressing guilt for not acknowledging a friendly greeting, I usually give a noncommittal "Hello" right back.
I can predict the next questions: "Are you married with children? Where are you from? Where did you grow up? How do you feel about long distance relationships?" Sigh.
Usually I just tell them I am online to play WWF's. Not interested in chatting, sorry.
But today, I felt a bit of mischief bubbling inside. It could have been left over from the panic attack yesterday.
On a side note, I am curious about my reactions. Why did I always get offended? Why did I supply curt replies? And when they started hitting on me, get angry?
Something snapped inside. I am tired of the game! I know what they are up to! (Although not always sure the motive. Con artist? Terrorist? Pervert? 14 year-old on Mommy's computer?)
I hope you don't think I am evil. My guess is most of these men are not who they say they are. I really don't know what their agenda is. Probably playful flirting. They never ask me for my bank account or address. But why Words with Friends? Are there not other platforms for flirtation online?
I kid you not, I have had dozens of encounters in the last several months. The first few I naively chatted with a bit until I realized where they were heading. Then I informed them I'm not into that kind of talk.
But curiously, the language is similar with each encounter.
Yesterday, I rose up and confronted all the CG's on Words with Friends - AND I beat them all in our word matches!
I even asked one if there was a how-to video on YouTube describing how to pick up women on WWF!
That guy took it well. He actually apologized for offending me. I am still beating him.
One guy took it quite badly. Kept "yelling" at me saying he was not "one of those fake guys". Then he resigned the game. Good thing too. I was leading by over 150 points - Woot Woot!
Good thing I had the forethought to change my user name.
I am now "Serafina". From Italy.
I like that. I had fun playing the role. But I'm done now. Back to "I'm just here to play WWF. Not into chatting. Have a nice day".
It was fun while it lasted!
And my headache is gone!
And I am smiling!
Now to walk like a ballerina to piano class.
Talk soon!
Happy Monday!
Love,
Zita
aka Serafina
ps Here is a short video of my Qi Gong/Hooping workout this morning. Maybe if CG's saw this, they'd leave me alone! LOL
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