Today is my 2nd day of intermittent fasting. I am noticing quite a bit about my eating habits. First of all, I tend to eat not only emotionally, but mindlessly.
I have decided to fast between the hours of 8 p.m. and and 12 p.m. the next day. So, essentially I am missing breakfast. I have been doing a lot of reading on this subject. And much of what we are told about eating is a myth. Much of which is propagated by the food industry, which would stand to lose mega bucks if we stopped eating one or two days a week!
I am rarely hungry first thing in the morning. I usually just eat with my granddaughter and mindlessly put bits of food here and there into my mouth. Mostly because it is there.
My eating disorder is embarrassing for me to admit. But it is part of why I began this blog over four years ago. To make changes. To be accountable.
So I am being accountable to you, my readers!
I find it stressful to go on "diets". I have tried them all. But planned fasting might work for me.
I woke up this morning and drank a big glass of water with a squeeze of lemon in it. Then I cleaned the kitchen and made breakfast for the rest of the household. I was not even tempted to eat at that point!
While my granddaughter ate her breakfast, I sat at the table with a tall glass of iced tea. With a squeeze of lemon. No sugar.
I did not eat until I went to lunch with my mother at 12:30! And I am feeling great! It was interesting feeling my stomach growl, but me not respond out of fear, thinking, "I've got to eat!"
Sheesh. Who is my stomach to be afraid of! It can growl all it wants. Whose afraid of a big fat stomach?
Not I!
I had a conversation with my brother a year or so ago. He told me that a growling stomach is a sign that fat is burning. I like that. I will imagine fat being burned.
A big bonfire of fat!
I am suffering from a performance hangover. But not as severe as usual. I will attribute it to fasting.
Last night I accompanied the choir for a performance of selections from Porgy and Bess. Last week I led sectionals and it was quite rough. I think we all were feeling a bit apprehensive.
But I did my normal obsessing the week before. I think of it as "performance cramming". Like cramming for an exam. I learn the piece, and practice a little each day. Then the week before performance I hum it in my head continually. And then I play it through the day before and day of many times.
Something clicked. Our performance was magical!
Music does that.
I want to think that I will be able to enjoy all aspects of my life, including musical performance if I finally conquer my eating disorder and lose this excess weight.
Yesterday was Day 1. Always starting over, I am. I weight in at 193 lbs. I tell myself at least I've remained below 200 for several years. At my heaviest I topped out at over 240 lbs!
But 193 is not good. I am still obese.
Yuck. I hate that word!
I am doing this not only for me, but my family and my students. After my student recital, which was a huge success, I was met by several concerned parents. They had tried to sign their kids up for summer piano lessons, but all of my class are filled with long waiting lists.
For summer!
In years past, I would make myself available to teach at the music center during the summer. Then a week before classes were to begin, I would get an email that several of my classes were either cancelled or combined due to low enrollment.
Not this year. And if the interest is there, I want to teach! I told the music center I'd stay late and come early on my appointed days.
I will need lots of energy to watch my granddaughter in the morning, teach piano in the afternoon and play the piano in church on Sunday!
I got this!
I step at a time. And refusing one bite at a time!
Happy Wednesday!
Talk to you tomorrow.
Love,
Zita
I have decided to fast between the hours of 8 p.m. and and 12 p.m. the next day. So, essentially I am missing breakfast. I have been doing a lot of reading on this subject. And much of what we are told about eating is a myth. Much of which is propagated by the food industry, which would stand to lose mega bucks if we stopped eating one or two days a week!
I am rarely hungry first thing in the morning. I usually just eat with my granddaughter and mindlessly put bits of food here and there into my mouth. Mostly because it is there.
My eating disorder is embarrassing for me to admit. But it is part of why I began this blog over four years ago. To make changes. To be accountable.
So I am being accountable to you, my readers!
I find it stressful to go on "diets". I have tried them all. But planned fasting might work for me.
I woke up this morning and drank a big glass of water with a squeeze of lemon in it. Then I cleaned the kitchen and made breakfast for the rest of the household. I was not even tempted to eat at that point!
While my granddaughter ate her breakfast, I sat at the table with a tall glass of iced tea. With a squeeze of lemon. No sugar.
I did not eat until I went to lunch with my mother at 12:30! And I am feeling great! It was interesting feeling my stomach growl, but me not respond out of fear, thinking, "I've got to eat!"
Sheesh. Who is my stomach to be afraid of! It can growl all it wants. Whose afraid of a big fat stomach?
Not I!
I had a conversation with my brother a year or so ago. He told me that a growling stomach is a sign that fat is burning. I like that. I will imagine fat being burned.
A big bonfire of fat!
I am suffering from a performance hangover. But not as severe as usual. I will attribute it to fasting.
Last night I accompanied the choir for a performance of selections from Porgy and Bess. Last week I led sectionals and it was quite rough. I think we all were feeling a bit apprehensive.
But I did my normal obsessing the week before. I think of it as "performance cramming". Like cramming for an exam. I learn the piece, and practice a little each day. Then the week before performance I hum it in my head continually. And then I play it through the day before and day of many times.
Something clicked. Our performance was magical!
Music does that.
I want to think that I will be able to enjoy all aspects of my life, including musical performance if I finally conquer my eating disorder and lose this excess weight.
Yesterday was Day 1. Always starting over, I am. I weight in at 193 lbs. I tell myself at least I've remained below 200 for several years. At my heaviest I topped out at over 240 lbs!
But 193 is not good. I am still obese.
Yuck. I hate that word!
I am doing this not only for me, but my family and my students. After my student recital, which was a huge success, I was met by several concerned parents. They had tried to sign their kids up for summer piano lessons, but all of my class are filled with long waiting lists.
For summer!
In years past, I would make myself available to teach at the music center during the summer. Then a week before classes were to begin, I would get an email that several of my classes were either cancelled or combined due to low enrollment.
Not this year. And if the interest is there, I want to teach! I told the music center I'd stay late and come early on my appointed days.
I will need lots of energy to watch my granddaughter in the morning, teach piano in the afternoon and play the piano in church on Sunday!
I got this!
I step at a time. And refusing one bite at a time!
Happy Wednesday!
Talk to you tomorrow.
Love,
Zita
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