I ate a cupcake last night. I am not proud of it.
But I got right back on my intermittent fasting/keto diet. And I only gained one pound. Speaking of which, I purchased keto strips to test to see if I am in ketosis. I was yesterday! Too bad I had to ruin my progress with a cupcake!
It was almost worth it. That was one fine cupcake!
And I was under much stress and anxiety! O.K. I also had a bowl of Doritos and half a cup of beer.
I was stressed! I know, no excuse. Sigh.
I was forced to attend a wedding. Mind you, it was a beautiful wedding. And the sweetest, most loving couple!
But I have severe social anxiety. I have been burdened with it my whole life. When I was little, I was labeled "shy". Later it was "insecure". Now it is social anxiety.
Whatever you call it, I have fear of being trapped in a room filled with people. Especially strangers. Making small talk.
Just typing it makes me shudder.
Somehow a room filled with people, with me onstage playing the piano or speaking is fine.
I'm an odd duck.
Quack.
In additional to my social anxiety, I was sad. Depressed even. I was still reliving the horrible news about family member in crisis. I couldn't imagine being in a room filled with beautiful, happy smiling people when I felt like I was dying inside.
But the situation is not as grim as it first seemed. I talked with my family member in crisis this morning. He has a positive attitude. And he has family and friends that love him and support him. We will survive. And he will emerge stronger, better, clean and sober! I will talk more about this when the case is close.
Anyway, it turned out much better than I had imagined. I owe it to my granddaughter. That's why I was there, after all. My daughter was like the unofficial "wedding planner", her husband the photographer. My little 21 month-old granddaughter the flower girl.
She was most adorable! And I chased that adorable little thing around the beautiful, historic Troutdale House for 6 hours yesterday!
I avoided all carbs for 4 of those hours. Then when my daughter came to give me a break, I sat downstairs in the beautifully decorated, air conditioned basement with a book. In the next room was the bar. And many snacks. At first I grabbed some raw cauliflower. Finally I gave in a grabbed a bowl of Doritos and salsa, poured a glass of beer and slyly slithered into my hideout. I gleefully chomped on my snacks and sipped beer, reading a book until I was needed again.
The ceremony was precious. The reception later was a hoot when the music started. My granddaughter shrieked when she heard the first notes of "Uptown Funk". She and a group of school age girls danced the night away!
But I got tired as the night drew on. My granddaughter grabbed a cupcake, licked off some of the frosting and then handed it to me as "Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy" came on. I didn't want to leave her side to dispose of it. So I ate it.
OMGoodness, that was a yummy cupcake!
All in all, it was a good evening. Cupcake and all!
And now back to it!
Happy Saturday!
And here is today's hooping video! Day 92!
But I got right back on my intermittent fasting/keto diet. And I only gained one pound. Speaking of which, I purchased keto strips to test to see if I am in ketosis. I was yesterday! Too bad I had to ruin my progress with a cupcake!
It was almost worth it. That was one fine cupcake!
And I was under much stress and anxiety! O.K. I also had a bowl of Doritos and half a cup of beer.
I was stressed! I know, no excuse. Sigh.
I was forced to attend a wedding. Mind you, it was a beautiful wedding. And the sweetest, most loving couple!
But I have severe social anxiety. I have been burdened with it my whole life. When I was little, I was labeled "shy". Later it was "insecure". Now it is social anxiety.
Whatever you call it, I have fear of being trapped in a room filled with people. Especially strangers. Making small talk.
Just typing it makes me shudder.
Somehow a room filled with people, with me onstage playing the piano or speaking is fine.
I'm an odd duck.
Quack.
In additional to my social anxiety, I was sad. Depressed even. I was still reliving the horrible news about family member in crisis. I couldn't imagine being in a room filled with beautiful, happy smiling people when I felt like I was dying inside.
But the situation is not as grim as it first seemed. I talked with my family member in crisis this morning. He has a positive attitude. And he has family and friends that love him and support him. We will survive. And he will emerge stronger, better, clean and sober! I will talk more about this when the case is close.
Anyway, it turned out much better than I had imagined. I owe it to my granddaughter. That's why I was there, after all. My daughter was like the unofficial "wedding planner", her husband the photographer. My little 21 month-old granddaughter the flower girl.
She was most adorable! And I chased that adorable little thing around the beautiful, historic Troutdale House for 6 hours yesterday!
I avoided all carbs for 4 of those hours. Then when my daughter came to give me a break, I sat downstairs in the beautifully decorated, air conditioned basement with a book. In the next room was the bar. And many snacks. At first I grabbed some raw cauliflower. Finally I gave in a grabbed a bowl of Doritos and salsa, poured a glass of beer and slyly slithered into my hideout. I gleefully chomped on my snacks and sipped beer, reading a book until I was needed again.
The ceremony was precious. The reception later was a hoot when the music started. My granddaughter shrieked when she heard the first notes of "Uptown Funk". She and a group of school age girls danced the night away!
But I got tired as the night drew on. My granddaughter grabbed a cupcake, licked off some of the frosting and then handed it to me as "Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy" came on. I didn't want to leave her side to dispose of it. So I ate it.
OMGoodness, that was a yummy cupcake!
All in all, it was a good evening. Cupcake and all!
And now back to it!
Happy Saturday!
And here is today's hooping video! Day 92!
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