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Year Three, Day 145: Meditating on Things Above v. The Matrix Below

I woke up really cranky. Seething with anger, really. Heart racing, head pounding. 

I have been obsessed with learning more about the Las Vegas shooter and his girlfriend as the authorities try to determine motive.  I have been getting angry and frustrated. This always happens after one of our mass shooting in the United States.

I am sure I'm not alone.

But I am quite irritated at how everything seems to go back to normal so quickly after these atrocities.

The news plasters it on every channel 24/7 for a few days and then they start focusing on shallow stories about celebrities and politicians. And the word wars begin on social media concerning gun control and 2nd amendment rights.

And the conspiracy theories pop up. But I must admit, this last shooting reeks.  It does not make any sense.  They found an arsenal of weapons in his home. His girlfriend had been conveniently flown out of the country prior to the shooting. And then wired much money. She claims to have a "clean conscience".

But why?  A wealthy retiree just suddenly snaps? This attack required much planning. There just has to be more to the story.

Sometimes I feel like our world is like the movie "The Matrix". Nothing is really as it seems.



 I need a break. The more I try to understand this evil, the more angry I become.  I will not avoid the news, but I'm at this place again where I need to distance myself.

Looking at pictures of my baby granddaughter helps soothe the burning fire in my heart. 

But then I get fired up again. My grandmotherly protective instinct kicks in. How will I protect my family, and this precious, innocent new life from the evils of this world?

I know. Focus on the light. The good will overcome.

I am going to take a break right now and pray. And read my Joyce Meyer book. And read from the psalms.

I have been pounding furiously on these computer keys! So intense are my emotions!

I will return when I am a bit calmer....ttfn...

I am back! And I am renewed.

Coincidentally, (or not!) my daughter called while I was making tea. She said,

"Mom, you told me you were not going to post anymore political things on Facebook anymore because you got too upset with the comments".

I knew what she was referring to. Remember how I said I was seething with anger about the latest mass shooting? Well, I was posting like mad this morning. Mostly about the need for gun control, like every other civilized country on this planet. I was quite worked up.

Then I went to my office job.  Unbeknownst to me, I got many comments. Some quite contrary. 

My heart starting beating rapidly. I could feel my blood pressure rise. I tried to explain myself to my daughter. But before we could start to debate, I thought of my granddaughter.

It does not help me be kind and loving to get so upset about things I cannot control. I can be aware. I can pray. I can sign petitions.  But ultimately, I still have my life to live.

I told my daughter how upset I was.

"I know", she said. "But I do not want you upset when you babysit Grace".

That did it. I deleted all of my political posts. The only ones that remain are the ones remembering the victims.  And some positive affirmations. And pictures of my granddaughter.

I feel much better.


I opened up my devotional book: Challenge: Daily Meditation Program Based on "The Spiritual Exercises of Saint Ignatius" by Mark Link, S.J.

The scripture today is Colossians 3:1:

"Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God." (Colossians 3:1 NIV)

I felt instant peace wash over me. I realized that this is not the only crazy time our world has ever seen. People of faith have lived through much worse circumstances and risen above.  

I need constant reminders to not let myself be swayed by the evils of this world.  

I read on in Colossians. This is 3:1-11. I wish I could paste this on my forehead!

Not Carnality but Christ

3 "If then you were raised with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ is, sitting at the right hand of God. Set your mind on things above, not on things on the earth. For you died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. When Christ who is our life appears, then you also will appear with Him in glory.
Therefore put to death your members which are on the earth: fornication, uncleanness, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. Because of these things the wrath of God is coming upon the sons of disobedience, in which you yourselves once walked when you lived in them.
But now you yourselves are to put off all these: anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy, filthy language out of your mouth. Do not lie to one another, since you have put off the old man with his deeds, 10 and have put on the new man who is renewed in knowledge according to the image of Him who created him, 11 where there is neither Greek nor Jew, circumcised nor uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave nor free, but Christ is all and in all."
(Colossians 3:1-11New King James Version (NKJV)


Today's exercise in the companion workbook to the book I am reading by Joyce Meyer (The Mind Connection: How the Thoughts You Choose Affect Your Mood, Behavior and Decisions) is this:

"Practically speaking, how does it help you overcome your troubles or difficulties when you consider who you are in Christ? Think of a specific issue you're facing and how you can apply this principle".  (The Mind Connection: How the Thoughts You Choose Affect Your Mood, Behavior and Decisions by Joyce Meyer
Of course I immediately wrote:

"I have been so angry, upset and anxious about the recent mass shooting in Las Vegas.  Was obsessing over the details, the motive, and gun control. Posting madly all over Facebook. Thankfully my daughter called me. She reminded me about how upset I got by comments on my political posts. I took them all down and started to instead focus on the love for my daughter, granddaughter, family and God."

All better now!
For today!

I think I will end my blog here. On a positive note.

Talk to you tomorrow!



P.S. Today was Day 109 of my Daily Hooping Experiment. I ate very healthy all day yesterday and so far today! Making a homemade green banana/mocha smoothie for breakfast, chicken sausage and sauerkraut for lunch, fruit for snacks and will have a healthy hot, steaming bowl of Pho for dinner!  

ps I seem to have gotten my white highlight function stuck. Every word is highlighted in white. I was getting angry and frustrated trying to fix it. I think it happens every time I cut and paste a scripture passage rather than type it manually. 

But then...

Every word highlighted in white is nice. White is the color for purity and holiness.  So I am going to leave it be.

Be still my pounding heart. 

Focus on all that is good, holy and pure.

So be it!


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