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Day 353: The Voice

I am blogging from the Multnomah County Library in St. John's today. I was so thrilled to come out of the concert, walk around the corner and find a library. A library! One of my absolute favorite places to be. Ever!

St. John's Library (https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:St._Johns_Library_in_Portland.jpg)


Our chamber music group gave a little noon concert at St. John's Christian Church as part of the St. John's Tuesday Noon Music program. (www.saintjohnsmusic.com).

We had a small, but very appreciate audience. I was especially impressed by a baby boy. He was maybe 11 months old, but one of the most enthusiastic audience members I have ever seen. Especially on my piano solos, when I would play the high notes, or loud, booming chords, I would hear him singing along with me with gusto! I think a musician was born today!

St. John's is lovely. I had not been her for many years. The community is thriving. Many cute little restaurants and lovely old Portland style homes.  The bus driver recommended a little Mexican restuarant up the street. I think I will head there for lunch.

I did not get a workout in today. I was actually a little stressed out about the fact that I will not get to the gym today.  I have students and then a choir rehearsal tonight. I was also a little stressed out about the fact that I had not much time to practice for today's performance.  I was so involved with my student recital Sunday.

This morning, I decided not to skip my morning prayer and bible study. I am so glad I had the wisdom!

In the book I am reading by Beth Moore,  Breaking Free (I am beginning Chapter 40 "Tearing Down the High Places"), I read this morning:

"Not all captivating thoughts come from painful experiences. Our thoughts can be held captive to someone or something that builds up our egos or satisfies our fleshly appetites. Simply put, captivating thoughts are controlling thoughts - things you find yourself meditating on too often."


This hit me like a brick.  I have been noticing my thoughts lately.  Anxious thoughts. Whining and complaining thoughts. Negative, self-deprecating thoughts. 
I noticed them on the bus this morning heading to the concert. I was berating myself for not being more prepared. Then I thought about my reading this morning. And I asked God to forgive me.  I felt a rush of air from my lungs. I felt relief and peace.  
Then I stopped my negative thoughts in their track. And started "thinking" the music I was playing today.  I am getting better at practicing in my head. And it sure beats the sound of my negative, judgmental voice.  

After I have finished posting my blog, I am going to take a walk in St. Johns. Perhaps find the Mexican restaurant. But more importantly get some exercise for today. That ought to shut up "the voice!"

Happy Tuesday!
 

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